I admit it. Calling June's farmer’s market organized by the
city of Alpine and hosted by Golden Acorn Casino “The World’s First
Produce-less Farmer’s Market” isn’t fair on several levels (hey, at least I
resisted the urge to call it a hobo’s market since 75% of it looked like a
garage sale … wait … I guess I’m not great at controlling urges).
First of all, it’s been my experience
that the term “farmer’s market” gets thrown around pretty loosely, so Alpine
wasn’t the first to abuse me and they won’t be the last. After all, El Centro’s farmer’s market should
have been the greatest of all time.
Think about it. “The Center” of one
of the most agriculturally productive regions in the world hosted a farmer’s
market, yet not a single farmer had a stall set up. Clearly, local farmers really don’t need a
local place to sell their produce, but it’s once a year boys. Do it for kicks at least, yeesh.
If there is one thing I learned from
the El Centro market back in January, it’s that even if it’s not truly a “farmer’s
market” there are always good bites to be had.
Like the nice German woman selling hand-prepped schnitzel sandwiches and
the best sauerkraut I’ve ever had:
And that was certainly the case at the
Alpine market. There was one stall
selling pacific island food, but the problem was that they were on island time
and I hate waiting. Smelled and looked
amazing though. There was also a couple
selling homemade beef jerky, which was perfection (not too tough, not too salty
and it tasted like carne asada). That
same couple was selling homemade zucchini relish, which was really good, but
just sweet enough that it could have used a spicier kick at the end.
But what stole the show, for me at
least, were “The Seasonal Gourmet’s” jellies and jams. And maybe best of all, it turns out TSG is
from IV! Charlotte Levy cooks up and
packages a nice assortment of preserves in a commercial kitchen in
Holtville. (OK, look. She told me the restaurant kitchen she uses
is a Holtville institution that according to her mother-in-law, an apparent biscuits and gravy snob, has the best biscuits and gravy.
Anywhere. I’m not here to promote
anyone, but this is vital information, no?
When are you ever going to go to Holtville enough times to find the
place out for yourself? I twisted her
arm a tiny bit. Nana’s Café. There, I said it.)
I took home two jars from The Seasonal
Gourmet. One filled with Apricot
Habanero Jelly, which is great on crackers, but will take a kosher hot dog to a
whole new level. And another filled with
Caramel Spiced Pear Butter, which is so good on pancakes and waffles it should
be illegal. (If anyone is interested in buying from The Seasonal Gourmet then just mention it in the comments section and I'll pass along her number there.)
But poking fun at Alpine’s market is
unfair on yet another level, local farmers couldn’t harvest! My wife chatted up one grower who was at the
market selling some sad looking little beets, and he said that with the
unseasonably cool weather his crops just weren’t ready to go. So maybe next year Alpine will have an
amazing farmer’s market.
All in all, it was worth the hop, skip and a jump we took up the hill. Yes, there were quite a few hill folk selling rusty knives and what not, but the mountain air was crisp and cool, the goodies we took home made it worthwhile anyway and, after strolling from stall to stall for about an hour and a half, jumping over to Janet’s Montana Café in Alpine was not exactly torture. (If you go, always order breakfast. If you order a burger there you might as well ask the cook to come out and punch you in the face. You’ll be happier. Trust me.)
